For Some People… Pregnancy JUST SUCKS!
If you’ve somehow stumbled on this post while looking to rejoice in the joy, beauty and miracles of pregnancy, this is not the post for you. If you’re feeling like a glowing goddess and enjoying every second of this blessing, this is not the post for you. In all honesty – this is not for anyone who wants even an ounce of positivity right now. Check back later when I’m not 39 weeks pregnant and TOTALLY OVER IT.
If however, you are cursing every time you have to roll over in bed, are feeling more like a beached whale than a glowing goddess and are convinced this whole pregnancy gig SUCKS – well my friend, welcome to the dark side – I am ready to commiserate with you. I am ready to rant our truth… That for some people, pregnancy just SUCKS.
Before my own pregnancy, I truly thought I’d be one of those perfect first time pregnant people who, like the magical unicorns they are, glow from the inside out. I’d love every second of it. I’d spend my oodles of free time bathing in my own life giving awesomeness with only the mildest aches and pains starting to sprout around maybe 41 weeks of pregnancy. I would do henna on my belly every day, nail dancers pose in yoga class well into my third trimester and be the happiest I’d ever been. I was a Doula. I was made for this.
Cue my first pregnancy and the sound of dreams shattering. Sure, I knew about all those less than desirable pregnancy symptoms, but 1) I wouldn’t get those and 2) the mild symptoms I might experience would obviously be outweighed by all the GLORIOUS GODDESS-LIKE stuff.
NOPE. I figure that the universe just really wanted me to be able to empathize with my clients and thus “gifted” me with every possible symptom (within the wide range of normal) imaginable. Seriously. Name it. Nausea. Heartburn. Indigestion. Symphysis Pubis Dysfunction. Hypertonic pelvic floor. Itchy skin. Dry eyes. Congestion. Lightning crotch. Swelling. Fatigue (oh so much fatigue). Headaches. Constipation. Mood swings. Vaginal varicose veins (WHY IS THIS A THING?!?!). Hemorrhoids. Low blood pressure. Non stop braxton-hicks contractions. Yep. My pregnancy symptoms were fierce, stubborn and determined to win this fight.
So, 9 long months and a million “it’ll be so worth it”, “try to enjoy it” and “it doesn’t last forever” comments later, I was beyond relieved to give birth. I would have birthed 10 times over if I could have skipped the pregnancy part.
Now, fast forward a couple years and a whole lotta forgetting later and we decide to do it all over again. This time would be different though. I wouldn’t hate this pregnancy. I wouldn’t get any of that stuff from last time. THIS WAS GOING TO BE AWESOME.
HA! You know what’s worse than a pregnancy that sucks? A toddler and a pregnancy that sucks. Now, I could list all the additional ways that pregnancy sucked this time, but I think ya’ll get the point – it’s been the same as last time – but WORSE. I have hated this pregnancy. I did get ALL the stuff. It has not been awesome. And no matter how positive those around me remain, at 39 weeks along, I still refuse to be swayed that I should be positive about it. It sucks. IT JUST SUCKS. And – I’m beyond ready for it to be over.
Sigh. End rant. End commiseration. I did tell you there would be no silver linings or morals of the story here. Well, actually, I do have one thought to leave you with. I have a moral of the story for anyone who hates pregnancy as much as me… It’s O-K-A-Y! It doesn’t make you ungrateful. You won’t love your baby any less. You shouldn’t feel guilty. It’s OK for this to just suck and for you to still want it regardless. Your discomfort, pain, displeasure is valid.